Friday, October 29, 2010

Just Kidding

So- I stayed up til midnight last night almost finishing the application for the chaplain internship (all but one fairly easy question) and also had the notion to email the director of the program to inform him of my progress and make sure he was still accepting applications.

His helpfully quick response went a little something like this: yadda yadda, interviewing someone today and will most likely fill the spot with them, yadda yadda, if you're interested in future sessions let me know and email me next Friday in the off-chance that the person today bombs, yadda yadda.

So his response was actually much appreciated (he saved me $35 application fee) and was worded nicely enough. However- my knee-jerk reaction was to send him a tongue-in-cheek email about how helpful it was that he gave me false hope about this application and I lost sleep doing it. Or maybe about how much I *loved* writing deeply emotional and vulnerable things about myself while 15 weeks pregnant. Alas- I knew that this was not the right way and he had no idea that all the cards would fall as they did. My hope is that the work I've done will stand for the next time I apply- so all I'll have to do is edit and update.

SO, back to the drawing board. Kind of. More like back to waiting. Have I mentioned I hate waiting? I am patient with grocery lines and traffic- but when I have a vision for the future- I want to run to it. Not walk, certainly not crawl. Run. And I hate to run- so when I feel the urge- it's a big deal.

I can come up with a hundred reasons why this will work out for the best, but it doesn't fix the disappointment. Alas alas.

So now I guess I can go back to trying to make more money. When/if I hear from the substitute teaching people- I'd like to get this show on the road. Ok- going to go plan my life.

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